This is something I have never openly said publicly : “I am an introvert”. I was ashamed of being an introvert, for nearly five years now. I was terrified of people teasing me publicly, like my friend was, while she sat in the corner all by herself. You know what, now I literally do not care. I was tying to be this person, I was not. And to be honest, I’m still not the real me. I am still trying to make a lot of changes in my life. I know I am not perfect, but when i achieve my ideal self , that is when I will be content with who I am. And that time, I will be the “perfect” me. And for me to achieve the ideal self, I am permitting myself to use up as much time as I need. But, who I was, especially in my 9th, 10th,11th and 12th grade was me trying to fit in and be someone else. I have lied so many times, just to fit in, and one among the many lies I said, the worst lie was, that I have consumed alcohol. The truth is, I have not even attempted to try alcohol. Yes, a few of you would call me “uptight” and ask me to “live a little”. And if you would have told me this two years back, I would have consumed alcohol, just to prove a point, but right now I don’t really care about what you would say. It’s not like somebody is stopping me from trying it out. I just know, it’s not now. Right now, I have to achieve so much in life. My mind is occupied by so many things, that petty things like alcohol and cigarettes, don’t excite me. At least, not yet. Right now, me trying to achieve my ideal self excites me. Music excites me. Books excites me. Dance excites me. Food excites me. Travelling excites me. Writing excites me. Being alone excites me. You have no idea, how many times I wish everybody in my house had gone out, not so that I could call my “imaginary boyfriend” home, but so that I can turn off all the fans and lights and switch the TV and my phone off and just let my thoughts come flashing down. This might be so strange for all of you, but unlike you, I am not afraid to face my thoughts. My thoughts are my best friend. So, you can go ahead and make fun of me. You can go ahead and call me whatever you want. I know what I am doing. And I know that I am doing something, solely because, I want to. And luckily I have three amazing people in my life who would stand by any decision I make.